Monday, February 26, 2007

Recycling Center: Rejected Jokes Edition


Israel's chief rabbi said in a religious ruling Tuesday that Jews must not wear fur skinned from live animals in order to prevent cruelty to animals. As a replacement, they suggested a stylish “foreskin coat.”

Prime Minister Tony Blair announced Wednesday that he will start pulling British troops out of Iraq next month, or, to put it in terms they understand, a “fortnight.”

Gambia's President Yahya Jammeh is claiming that his concoction of green herbal paste and bananas can cure AIDS, although you don’t want to know where you put the bananas.

It was reported that Britney Spears shaved her head after a fight with Kevin Federline, in which he threatened to have her hair tested to find out what drugs she has been using, proving once again that there’s nothing more entertaining than watching these two outsmart each-other.

Archeologists unveiled the tombs Tuesday of a Pharaonic butler and a scribe that have been buried for more than 3000 years. A preliminary autopsy on the scribe indicates the butler did it.

A man who was fired by IBM for visiting an adult chat room at work is suing the company for 5 million dollars, claiming he is an Internet addict who deserves treatment and sympathy rather than dismissal, especially since he’s supporting a wife and three women who spell Cindi with an “I.”

Australian officials plan to restrict and eventually ban the sale of incandescent light bulbs in an effort to cut greenhouse gas emissions by 4 million tons by 2012, reduce household power bills by up to 66 percent, and dramatically limit the number of Australians required to screw in a lightbulb.

Bill Gates said this week that he limits the amount of time his 10 year-old daughter can spend on the computer to 45 minutes a day for games, and 2 hours for removing spyware

1 comment:

TG said...

Australia requires some people to screw inside lightbulbs. What a country!