Tuesday, February 09, 2010
Saturday, February 06, 2010
The Flop House Episode Fifty-Four is ONLINE
Don't hate the player; hate the game. On second thought, hate the Gamer. Meanwhile, Dan laments the downfall of the previously-dependable entertaining-trash team of Neveldine/Taylor, Matt finds his new super-muscular bĂȘte noir, and Elliott comes up with a much wackier way to end an already wacky movie.
0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme
0:37 - 33:42- We welcome Matt Koff, our second guest host of a still-young 2010, and we introduce him to a rising star named Gerard Butler, in a little film called Gamer.
33:43 - 37:57 - Final Judgments (Dan: almost-good/bad bad, Elliott: bad bad, Matt: bad bad bad)
37:58 - 48:38- A very navel-gazing movie mailbag.
38:39 - 51:47 - Two out of three sad bastards recommending aint' bad.
51:48 - 52:37 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
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Wikipedia synopsis of Gamer
0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme
0:37 - 33:42- We welcome Matt Koff, our second guest host of a still-young 2010, and we introduce him to a rising star named Gerard Butler, in a little film called Gamer.
33:43 - 37:57 - Final Judgments (Dan: almost-good/bad bad, Elliott: bad bad, Matt: bad bad bad)
37:58 - 48:38- A very navel-gazing movie mailbag.
38:39 - 51:47 - Two out of three sad bastards recommending aint' bad.
51:48 - 52:37 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
Press the play button above to listen to this episode
Download Mp3
Paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes of The Flop House delivered to you directly, as they're released.

Wikipedia synopsis of Gamer
Labels:
bad movies,
Elliott Kalan,
Flop House,
Gamer,
Matt Koff,
podcast,
video games
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
The Return of Gchat Theater
What do comedy writers do with their day? They spend most if it irritating each other with deliberately bad jokes. To wit:
Matt: I hear it's restaurant week.
me: I hear it's BREASTaurant week.
Matt: where's my whiskey...
Matt: the voices
Matt: I hear it's restaurant week.
me: I hear it's BREASTaurant week.
Hubba hubba!
Matt: You don't hear that.
You just wanted to type "breast."
me: BREASTaurant
Soooo... what's in the news.
Everyone's going crazy for this new Apple iPad!
Matt: why
why are you doing this
me: I say that pad's not going to absorb any menstrual blood.
Not worth it.
Matt: where's my whiskey...
me: Obama's doing a spending freeze.
Have a heart Mr. President.
Matt: can't... take... much... more
me: It's January!
Send your money to Miami!
Matt: the voices
the voices won't leave
me: Seriously though, you've been a terrible audience.
me: Seriously though, you've been a terrible audience.
Just awful.
I'm gonna take a break and go to the bar, but I'll be back in 15.
Matt: the blood
the pain
the horror
Be glad I don't have your gmail address.
Be glad I don't have your gmail address.
Hey, I'm the Featured Writer's Profile at Whim Quarterly
Whim Quarterly--the world's quarterliest humor magazine--asked all contributors to fill out a survey adapted from the gripping, must-read social work book of 1917, Social Diagnosis by Mary Ellen Richmond, and as of right now, I am the featured writer. Read my snappy answers to outdated questions over on the Whim website.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
The Flop House Episode Fifty-Three is ONLINE
Is this the only time three grown men watched Hannah Montana: The Movie and it wasn't creepy? (Answer: with Stuart involved, it's always a little bit creepy.) We spend more time discussing it than the writers spent writing it. Meanwhile, Dan questions the whole premise of teen-by-day/ pop-starlet-by-night, Stuart redefines topical humor, and Elliott re-imagines the movie as a taut psychological thriller.
0:00 - 0:34 - Introductions and Theme
0:35 - 3:00 - We welcome Elliott back and, for some reason, Stuart wastes time quizzing him and Dan about current events.
3:01 - 37:24 - We discuss Hannah Montana: The Movie, because surely the audience for that picture was white males in their late twenties to early.
37:25 - 40:27 - Final Judgments (Elliott, Stu, and Dan agree - bad, but inoffensive)
40:28 - 53:49- Our longest letters segment yet, resulting in one of our patented vague Flop House contests.
53:50 - 56:49 - A very short sad bastards recommend.
56:50 - 58:14 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
Paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes of The Flop House delivered to you directly, as they're released.

Wikipedia synopsis of Hannah Montana: The Movie
0:00 - 0:34 - Introductions and Theme
0:35 - 3:00 - We welcome Elliott back and, for some reason, Stuart wastes time quizzing him and Dan about current events.
3:01 - 37:24 - We discuss Hannah Montana: The Movie, because surely the audience for that picture was white males in their late twenties to early.
37:25 - 40:27 - Final Judgments (Elliott, Stu, and Dan agree - bad, but inoffensive)
40:28 - 53:49- Our longest letters segment yet, resulting in one of our patented vague Flop House contests.
53:50 - 56:49 - A very short sad bastards recommend.
56:50 - 58:14 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
Press the play button above to listen to this episode
Download Mp3
Paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes of The Flop House delivered to you directly, as they're released.

Wikipedia synopsis of Hannah Montana: The Movie
Labels:
bad movies,
Elliott Kalan,
Flop House,
podcast,
Stuart Wellington
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Mr. Whitepants at the UCB Theater this Friday!
...As part of the A-Side/B-Side 1 Year Anniversary Show! In the words of the hosts:Come celebrate being awesome with us! Against all odds and common decency, we've made it to a year. That's cool, right?
Featuring:
New Exc!tement
Kelly and Greg
Mr. Whitepants
The best and the oddest from three heavy-hitting sketch groups. We bring you the crowd-pleasers you know (A-sides), and the uncensored material you'll never forget (B-sides). Hilarious and strange, come get a look into the minds of sketch comedy's most innovative.
Hosted by Aaron Kheifets (Classy) and James Eason (Mother)
Mr. Whitepants' Comedy Hour
part of "A Side/B Side"
at The Upright Citizen's Brigade Theater
307 W. 26th St. between 8th and 9th Aves.
Manhattan
11pm, Friday, Jan. 22
$5
Labels:
A-Side/B-Side,
Mr. Whitepants' Comedy Hour,
show listing,
UCBT
Friday, January 15, 2010
Mr. Whitepants' Comedy Hour - 1 Year Anniversary Best-Of Show!

Tuesday, January 26th at 8:30 pm at The Magnet Theater (www.magnettheater.com corner of 29th st. at 8th Ave). $5
Sunday, January 10, 2010
The Flop House Episode Fifty-Two is ONLINE
If this is Dragonball: Evolution, we'd hate to see Dragonball: Neanderthal (this joke contributed by Milton Berle's secret joke file). Meanwhile, Dan tries to fill Elliott's tiny shoes, Stuart discusses the career of Ernie Hudson, and Nigel sounds 10% smarter than either of them.
0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme
0:37 - 3:47 - We introduce our guest co-host, Nigel Wood.
3:48 - 29:50 - We discuss 90 minutes of bright colors, loud noises, and disconnected action, in a DVD mislabeled "Dragonball: Evolution."
29:51 - 33:23 - Final Judgments Stu - bad-bad, Nigel bad-bad, Dan - actually kind of enjoyed it
33:24 - 34:30 - Station identification
34:31 - 41:46 - The sad bastards recommend.
45:47 - 45:02 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
Paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes of The Flop House delivered to you directly, as they're released.

Wikipedia synopsis of Dragonball: Evolution
0:00 - 0:36 - Introductions and Theme
0:37 - 3:47 - We introduce our guest co-host, Nigel Wood.
3:48 - 29:50 - We discuss 90 minutes of bright colors, loud noises, and disconnected action, in a DVD mislabeled "Dragonball: Evolution."
29:51 - 33:23 - Final Judgments Stu - bad-bad, Nigel bad-bad, Dan - actually kind of enjoyed it
33:24 - 34:30 - Station identification
34:31 - 41:46 - The sad bastards recommend.
45:47 - 45:02 - Goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.
Press the play button above to listen to this episode
Download Mp3
Paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes of The Flop House delivered to you directly, as they're released.

Wikipedia synopsis of Dragonball: Evolution
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