The Flop House Episode Six is ONLINE

In this episode, the gang chats about Perfect Stranger, the top Internet chat-based thriller that was released twenty years after Internet chatting was invented. Meanwhile, Stuart engages in some creative screenplay retitling, Dan proposes a twist ending certification board, and Simon drops a personal bombshell.

Download it here, or paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes delivered to you directly, as they're released.

0:00 - 0:33 - Introduction and theme.
0:34 - 1:54 - Partial synopsis of Perfect Stranger, courtesy of Wikipedia.
1:55 - 28:27 - According to the Simpsons musical Streetcar! "...a stranger's just a friend you haven't met!" But that was before the movie Perfect Stranger.
28:28 - 29:52 - Final judgments.
29:53 - 36:18 - Our first listener mail!
36:19 - 40:01 - The sad bastards recommend.
40:02 - 44:00 - Simon reveals some sad news.
44:01 - 46:25 - Podcasty business, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

The Flop House Episode Five is ONLINE

In the second of our special Halloween episodes, the gang gets caught in the deathtrap that is Saw III. Meanwhile, Simon spins an elaborate handstand analogy, Stuart gets turned on by Icyface, and Dan offers Jigsaw's girlfriend a little relationship advice.

Download it here, or paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes delivered to you directly, as they're released.

0:00 - 0:40 - Introduction and the special "Halloween Remix" Flop House Theme
0:40 - 2:31 - Partial synopsis of Saw III, courtesy of Wikipedia
2:32 - 29:49 - Does unremitting torture and pain appeal to you? Then, why not watch Saw III, so you can experience a little of it? ZING! You got zinged, Saw III!
29:50 - 32:53 - Final judgements.
32:54 - 36:57 - The sad bastards recommend.
36:58 - 39:00 - THE SHOCKING DENOUMENT!
39:01 - 43:00 - Podcasty business, next show teaser, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

The Flop House Episode Four is ONLINE

In the first of two special Halloween episodes, the team examines the sure-misfire team-up of Jim Carrey and Joel Schumacher, The Number 23. Meanwhile, in a shocking twist, Simon rails against twist endings; Stuart discusses digital sex (in an analog way); and Dan can't quite get a handle on how to name movie characters.

Download it here, or paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes delivered to you directly, as they're released.

0:00 - 0:37 - Introduction and the special "Halloween Remix" Flop House Theme
0:38 - 4:11 - Synopsis of The Number 23, courtesy of Wikipedia
4:12 - 34:00 - Wouldn't it be spooky if this segment was TWENTY-THREE MINUTES LONG? No? It wouldn't? Then you've learned the chilling secret of The Number 23.
34:01 - 36:40 - Final judgements.
36:41 - 40:52 - The sad bastards recommend.
40:53 - 44:07 - Next show teaser, goodbyes, theme, and outtakes.

The Flop House Episode Three is ONLINE!

The Flop House team listens to (and, unfortunately, watches) A Sound of Thunder. Meanwhile, Simon plans a diamond heist, Stu does a little Edward Burns math, and Dan apologizes for things he didn't do... and the entire gang would rather be watching a film about a crime-fighting dinosaur.

Download it here, or paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes delivered to you directly, as they're released.

0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme music.
0:34 - 2:56 - Synopsis of A Sound of Thunder, courtesy of Wikipedia.
2:57 - 32:06 - What is the sound of one thunder clapping?
32:07 - 35:51- The sad bastards recommend stuff that doesn't suck.
35:52 - 39:49 - Goodbyes, theme music, and outtakes.

The Flop House: Episode Two - Memory

In the second episode of The Flop House, the team travels deep into unexplored reaches of the Billy Zane catalogue, to unearth a repressed (or at least barely theatrically released) Memory. Meanwhile, Simon contemplates suicide, Stuart can't seem to turn off his phone, and Dan coins a new improv troupe name.

Download it here, or paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes (or your favorite podcatching software) to have new episodes delivered to you directly, as they're released.

0:00 - 0:34 - Introduction and theme music.
0:34 - 1:40 - Synopsis of Memory courtesy of Wikipedia.
1:40 - 28:19 - Oh, Memory, why can't we forget you?
28:19 - 32:56 - The sad bastards recommend stuff that doesn't suck.
32:56 - 34:30 - Goodbyes, theme music, and outtakes.

The Flop House Theme courtesy of Keith Burgun.

Hey Everyone - I'm Podcasting!

So... what's new with you? Nothing? That's cool. Me? Well I'VE STARTED A PODCAST.

Yeah, sure, Captains in Space is technically a video podcast, but this is the first podcast that I'm personally producing. And it's free of all those pesky "pictures," which makes it all the easier to enjoy in a crowded subway, or while driving your car.

What's the podcast? It's called The Flop House. What's it about? It's about me and my friends Simon Fisher and Stuart Wellington getting together, having a drink or two, watching a bad movie (usually one released in the last few years), and then discussing it. And you get to listen. What fun for you! What could be more exciting than three dudes rambling into a cheap microphone? (Speaking of which, I apologize for the questionable audio quality of this first installment - I learned a lot producing and editing it, which will be applied to all future recordings).

What's on tap for the first episode? Let's read from the official Flop House blog:

The Flop House: Episode One - Stealth

In the inaugural episode of The Flop House, the team examines Rob Cohen's fighter-plane-run-amok film Stealth. Meanwhile, Simon discusses sex toys, Stuart does some video store filing, and Dan mispronounces "sentient" a lot.

Also, the gang recommends a few things that don't suck.

0:00 - 1:10 - Introductions, themes, and such.
1:10 - 21:30 - Stealth. Fun factory, or snore factory?
21:30 - 24:30 - Final Judgments
24:30 - 29:10 - The sad bastards recommend.
29:10 - 30:28 - It's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday. Also to the Flop House.

Look for new episodes bimonthly (although the second one may be slightly delayed due to a Stuart business trip). To subscribe to have new episodes delivered directly to you as they're released, paste theflophouse.libsyn.com/rss into iTunes, or your favorite podcatching software.









The super-geniuses behind the Flop House.

In Which I Reimagine a Motion Picture Ad Campaign

Last night I was having a drink with friends, after going to see the excellent Korean monster movie The Host. Talk turned (as it usually does, with me) to bad movies. My buddy Simon mentioned that he hated the tag line to the recent non-smash-hit Hannibal Rising. The poster is reproduced below (letters enlarged for readability).



















He pointed out that, by definition, something can't start with revenge. So I suggested an alternate tag line:




















Or, if they wanted to inject a little bit of comics page whimsy, how about a word balloon:



















Then again, with the mask on, it would probably sound more like:



















In the end, we decided on brutal honesty:



















Oh, with deft Photoshopping skills like this, it's a wonder that I'm still a low-paid temp.